The Hard Goodbye

Sorry for the not so joyful posts lately, but here is yet another one.  For the 5^th and final week of our trip, Julie’s family was in town and we all had to head to Lusaka for the week.  That meant saying our goodbyes in Zimba this past Monday.  Here is an excerpt from my journal that I wrote about the day we left…

Day 29:  Monday 22/7/13

Today is the day I had been dreading since Julie’s family arrived last Thursday.  I did not want to leave.  To say goodbye was not an option for me.  I was not ready – by a long shot.  I would have never imagined that a small town in the middle of Africa could capture my heart like it has. 

• I will miss waking up to the loud trucks and the roosters in the mornings.
• I will miss saying good morning to Gertrude while she is cooking breakfast.
• I will miss having my quiet time in that corner chair with God, my Bible, and some worship music in the mornings.
• I will miss chapel in the mornings and hearing those sweet, sweet African voices.
• I will miss Charity and Purity’s high-fives every morning (and every time we met after a short break).
• I will miss rounding with Joan and those incredibly special teaching moments that we had often.
• I will miss attempting to handle those male and female ward patients – trying not to kill them.
• I will miss those days in OPD where it is so busy that you are trying and trying to see the patients, but you can’t even tell that you have made the slightest dent.
• I will miss discussing those difficult patients with Dan and/or Joan.
• I will miss the walks to and from the hospital.
• I will miss the sunsets.
• I will miss Jock, the dog, greeting us every time we were in the compound.
• I will miss the kids:  Choolwe, Sharon, Caleb, Jeremiah, Faith, and the others.
• I will miss Gertrude’s wonderful dinners.
• I will miss having dinner with Dan and Joan – especially the days when Dan just talked and talked – they were rare, but too funny when they did happen!
• I will miss Joan sharing her heart with us – from her frustrations to her testimony.  She is such an amazing woman of God and has been through so much.  I pray that she has the strength to continue on.
• I will miss movie nights (especially with the popcorn), even if we never made it through an entire movie without falling asleep.
• I will miss Dan and Joan.
• I will miss Gertrude.
• I will miss Ruth and Keiko.
• I will miss Jesse and Selinda.
• I will miss my patients.
• I will miss Joan’s reaction when she does not approve of something her patient is doing, “Badala (or mama) pepe!” 

Most of all, I will miss seeing God in just about every situation I was in – from the joyful, the sorrowful, the painful, the scary, and even those times when life was just average.  I never want to lose that focus.  I pray that I don’t.

I never wanted to leave Zimba, but I pray that I can return very soon.  My heart has remained in that place.  Thank you all so much for praying for this journey.  I heard from several people before I left that this trip will be nothing but fantastic.  That it has.  I will return back to the States physically, but emotionally, I will still be in Zimba.  I will have to relearn how to survive in American culture, but one thing that I do not want to do is continue back into the norm of life there – I never want this experience to leave me.

(I apologize in advance for this picture.  I was a complete basket case the day that we left.  None of us thought to get a group photo before our last day…)